


Just This Once

by Windstorms



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003)
Genre: Adult Edward Elric, First Time, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Post-Fullmetal Alchemist (2003), Post-Fullmetal Alchemist: Conqueror of Shamballa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-11-20 21:55:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18132698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Windstorms/pseuds/Windstorms
Summary: Roy makes plans. Ed ruins them as always.





	Just This Once

**Author's Note:**

> This is a re-posting of an old work.

They were only going to do this once. That had been the plan; it had seemed so utterly brilliant in its simplicity at the time. Roy wasn’t even sure what had prompted him to come up with such an idea anymore. All he knew was they had been bickering and stalking around each other with repressed desire for years and someone was going to get hurt if they didn’t let it out.  
  
_Get too close to the sun and you’ll burn._ Roy had always taken that saying to mean if he got too close to the forbidden he would pay the price. Edward Elric was forbidden. It didn’t matter how much Roy had come to want him. He had distanced himself from Edward because it was the right thing to do. He resisted Ed’s awkward offers and forced himself to behave. Fullmetal was his subordinate. He had been belligerent at the best of times and openly hostile at the worst. Yes, he was eighteen and calmer and more reserved now, but he was still too young. Roy had practically watched him grow up – it was wrong, wrong, wrong. Roy repeated the litany of reasons they couldn’t do this like a mantra each night he went to bed alone wanting the one person he shouldn’t have  
  
Until one day Edward had taken matters into his own hands.  
  
“Why can’t we have anything?” he had asked Roy for what was probably the tenth time since his return from the other side of the Gate.  
  
“We’ve been over this. We just can’t Edward,” Roy had said patiently and waited for the usual ranting and name-calling to commence.  
  
Edward had studied him with those intense golden eyes for a while and then simply reached up, tugged at Roy’s collar until they were face to face and kissed him and Roy had been so shocked he had let him and responded in earnest. That was the instant Roy realized his resolve had slowly been slipping away ever since Edward had returned from that other world, grown up and even more frustratingly enticing than he had been before.  
  
Roy was determined to control the situation however. He limited their contact. He was determined not to let anything they did progress past the point of no return. They had shared some heated kisses and a few heavy petting sessions with all their damnable clothing remaining on at all times, but nothing more.  
  
They had been doing this for no more than a few weeks. Only in his office and only once everyone else was gone for the day. Each time Roy let it happen things seemed to go a little bit further. He wanted Edward so much it took all his restraint to put a stop to things, but each time he would resolutely go home alone and take a cold shower and tell himself he could keep a handle on this situation. He could.  
  
He was wrong.  
  
It had started to slip completely out of his control in the office a few hours before. It was a Friday afternoon during the middle of a summer heat wave, the oppressive air was stifling and Roy let his staff go home at noon to start their weekends early. Only Ed had remained, sitting uncharacteristically silent on one of the leather couches and watching Roy do his paperwork until everyone else had left.  
  
Roy should’ve known he was in trouble then.  
  
Edward stood and strolled casually towards him, walked around the desk and lowered himself into Roy’s chair to straddle his lap. Roy forgot all about any good intentions he’d had of finishing paperwork and wrapped his arms around the lithe body, readily fixed his lips to Ed’s throat, worked his way up to his jaw, then finally to that mouth.  
  
They kissed and kissed until the position they were in became almost embarrassingly uncomfortable for both of them. “You’re a complete bastard,” Ed moaned a little into the next kiss. “You always tease me like this.”  
  
“We can’t do any more than this Ed,” Roy whispered. He ran his hand lightly up and down Ed’s back and tried to leave it at simple strokes but the more contact he made the more he wanted.  
  
“Why can’t we do more than this?” Ed suddenly arched his back and rocked forward in Roy’s lap. The friction was electrifying and Roy groaned with the effort it took not to throw the blond across his desk right then and there. All his painstaking resolve was crumbling, fleeing him with each roll of Edward’s hips.  
  
All the reasons he had for why they shouldn’t do this were forgotten when Ed reached one tentative hand down between their bodies to cup Roy through his pants.  
  
That was forbidden territory in the arrangement they had, but damned if Roy’s body could make his brain care. Both of them fully clothed and Ed’s uncertain touches were searing him more than the midday sun ever could and Roy felt like he would explode if he didn’t have more of Ed, all of him, _now_. Maybe there was a way they could settle this once and for all…  
  
“Maybe we could. Ah - one time. Just this once,” Roy relented. Somehow saying it felt more like a blissful victory than a crushing defeat.  
  
Damn it, he couldn’t control this. He’d tried. But Edward would always undermine him, and fuck if maybe that wasn’t a good thing. He gasped against Ed’s ear, nuzzling the side of his face.  
  
“What are you talking about?” Ed couldn’t quite keep the hopeful tone out of his voice as his hand continued to fumble against Roy’s crotch.  
  
“Let’s go back to my place,” Roy suggested. He bucked his hips to meet Ed’s hand and growled softly.  
  
Ed stopped his groping and blinked rapidly at him. Roy could tell Edward was stunned at the offer. All the time the younger man had been trying to initiate things Roy had never let things progress out of the office even once. “What are you saying?" Ed demanded.  "Don’t toy with me old man.”  
  
“I’m not Ed. I’m not,” Roy said fervently, trying futilely to force himself to relax at the sudden loss of friction against his arousal.  He raised his hands to run them through Ed's silky blond hair. “We can have sex – once – to get this out of our systems once and for all so things can go back to normal.”  
  
“One time and it will be out of our systems?” Ed asked skeptically, leaning his head back into the touch.  
  
“Yes, one time and it will be over” Roy confirmed. He lowered a hand to Edward’s side experimentally and marveled that he was finally going to allow himself to have the object of his crush, attraction, lust - whatever this was between them. “Once is all it will take.”  
  
Oh, how those words came back to haunt him.  
  
*  
  
Roy was surprised he hadn’t had to pull the car over and ravage the younger man on the way. Now that he had finally committed to the idea of going through with this, he found he could barely contain himself enough to make the short drive to his house.  
  
Out of the car, into the house, up the stairs, down the hall to the bedroom and Roy thought he would lose his mind. It was too long a journey in their aroused state and they kept getting tangled up tugging each other’s clothes off along the way. Finally skin to skin in the hallway just outside his bedroom and the sensation was enough to almost make Roy come on the spot.  
  
Their first time, what was supposed to be their only encounter, they barely made it to his bed. Ed was anxious and clumsy and Roy was eager like he hadn’t been since it was his own first time and it was over too soon for both of them but Roy found it hopelessly endearing. The second time, he told himself, was simply to make up for the brevity of the first time. The third time, when they were cleaning up in the shower and Ed had pushed him up against the tile wall and proceeded to prove what a quick learner he was, Roy couldn’t form enough coherent thought to come up with an excuse why they shouldn’t.  
  
After that they had done it in every room of Roy’s house over the next two days.  
  
It was supposed to have been one single, solitary sexual experience to get whatever this was out of their heads forever so they could go on with their lives. Instead, one time had turned into one long sleepless night of many recurring fantasies finally coming to life, because hell, Ed was beautiful and golden and finally _there_ in Roy’s bed so why waste an opportunity they would never have again? One heated summer night had spun into one exquisite weekend because Roy had wanted Edward so much for so long he couldn’t get enough and he didn’t think he ever would.  
  
*  
  
Monday morning came as it inevitably always did. Roy had woken Ed for another round as the sunrise began to stream through the bedroom windows. Sunlight glinting off the automail and bright rays rippling through his hair; the sight of Edward moving beneath him, tanned skin nearly glowing in the sun nearly took Roy’s breath away.  
  
Edward rolled out from under him when it was over, panting slightly and staring dazedly at the ceiling. Roy sprawled on his side and watched him silently, barely containing a self-satisfied smirk.  
  
Several minutes passed and they were starting to cool off. Roy was just beginning to lazily let his mind wander, considering all the new things he could do to Ed in the shower when Edward sat up with a resigned sigh. “You have to head in to work soon,” Ed said finally. His tone had a finality to it that Roy couldn’t quite comprehend.  
  
“Mmm,” Roy said noncommittally, watching Edward with a slight frown. Work was not important right now. The rest of the world could wait a little longer. Something was wrong with Ed. Somewhere Roy had done something wrong and he couldn’t understand it. He thought Ed had wanted this as much as he did. Hell, the brat had been all but demanding this for weeks. But now Edward was sitting up in his bed looking like his world was ending.  
  
“So now it’s over,” Ed said softly. His eyes flicked to Roy’s and then he scooted slightly towards the edge of the bed and away from Roy.  
  
“Over?” Roy raised an eyebrow quizzically. Then the realization hit him. His stupid declaration in his office Friday afternoon before he’d distractedly driven them to his house so fast he only dimly remembered which route he had taken.  
  
Ed bit his lip and averted his gaze from Roy, hands fisted in the sheets. So tense - ready to bolt, prepared to dutifully leave the instant he was told.  
  
It shouldn’t have made Roy’s stomach clench quite the way it did. Maybe Roy should have sent him on his way after their first sloppy encounter. Maybe he should have kept his promise of one time coming together to break this magnetic force that kept them gravitating towards each other. He tried to believe that, but instead he couldn’t fathom why he’d fought against this for so long. They should have done this ages ago.  
  
He’d been a fool to think he’d ever be able to let Edward go afterwards.  
  
“No Edward, it doesn’t have to be over. I don’t want it to be,” he said calmly. “And I hope you still don’t want it to be either.”  
  
“But you said. In your office-”  
  
“I thought one time would get us over these feelings,” Roy murmured, grasping for the right thing to say. There was really no way around it. He swallowed hard. Edward was going to enjoy this so much Roy would probably want to smack him. “I was wrong.”  
  
Ed smiled helplessly at the admission but didn’t laugh at him or gloat triumphantly like he certainly would have in his younger days. In that moment Roy knew all his logical reasons why they shouldn’t be doing this were completely unfounded. He suddenly felt an aching sorrow that he had let so much time go by. So much wasted time to make up for…  
  
“So… what now then?” Ed asked. He said it hesitantly like he still didn’t quite trust Roy’s words, like he could still leave if it was necessary.  
  
“Now, you stay,” Roy breathed, reaching out to bridge the distance between them. He cupped the back of Ed’s head with one hand and stroked his cheek with the other and pulled him down for a kiss.  
  
He felt Ed’s mouth break into a smile against his before he allowed Roy’s tongue entrance. Roy rolled Ed onto his back in one fluid movement and lowered himself over him without ever breaking the kiss. He could go in late this morning.  
  
On second thought, he would call in sick.  
  
For once, Ed had no complaints about Roy’s plan.


End file.
